


I Hate (love) You

by littlefrog1025



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Feels, Breaking Up & Making Up, Derek Has Issues, Happy Ending, Hurt Stiles, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-15
Updated: 2014-12-15
Packaged: 2018-03-01 13:14:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2774309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlefrog1025/pseuds/littlefrog1025
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles can't take the back-and-forth anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Hate (love) You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tataniastorm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tataniastorm/gifts).



> For the lovely tataniasstorm, who I think was my very first reader... xoxxoxoxoxoxoxo

* * *

His dad was working late again tonight. He called around seven to tell Stiles he wouldn’t be home until around 8AM the next morning. Stiles said okay, knowing the routine, and returned to his Indiana Jones movie marathon.

He was at the end of _The Temple of Doom_ when he started to doze off. Weekly supernatural baddies, a child-like girlfriend, and 5 college essays can exhaust a teenage boy on a quiet, Friday night.

He woke up a little over an hour later with a throw blanket over him and the sound of the DVD menu on repeat ditched in favor of total silence. He yawned, sitting up, and wasn’t the least bit surprised at the intense, forlorn gaze on him by a set of pale green eyes beneath thick, dark eyebrows, sitting adjacent to him in an armchair.

“How long have you been here,” Stiles asked.

“I watched all of _The Last Crusade_ and the DVD extras then turned off the TV. Your bedroom window is locked.”

“I know.”

“The backdoor wasn’t.”

“I know.” There’s so much being said underneath those two words it echoes between them like a sonic pulse. The window was closed to keep someone who usually climbs in, out, and the backdoor was unlocked to let someone else in instead. Maybe someone who’d rather watch him sleep than break one second of his peacefulness.

Stiles pulled the blanket off of him and let his feet touch the carpet. “Would you like to sit in silence, or is there something you’d like to say?”

“You kissed me. You said you wouldn’t again after Malia,” Derek says quickly.

“Guess I’m a liar,” Stiles responded with a flippant tone. “But you kissed me right back.”

Stiles stood and approached Derek, stilling before his knees. He nudged them open smoothly with his own. “Want me to keep kissing you,” Stiles flirted, with a determined look about his face.

He didn’t give Derek a chance to answer before he gliding himself into Derek’s lap and straddling his thighs. “Because I do,” Stiles said, answering his own question with hot, sweet breath against Derek’s lips. Stiles kissed him chastely. Soft lips against soft lips surrounded by prickly hair, in a kiss so tender and inviting Stiles could feel Derek’s heart flutter against the palm of his hand pressed against the hard chest.

“Stiles…”

“Just kiss me. Please.” Stiles lips returned to Derek’s own. He could feel Derek gradually creep closer and closer to letting himself go. Letting himself be desired by the human boy.

Their lips part slightly and Derek tentatively licked into Stiles’ mouth before sliding his tongue inside.

Stiles assumed Derek’s wolf called out to him, wanting more. Whining for more. Howling for more, because Derek suddenly surged up, holding Stiles in his lap with a firm grip on his body and kissed him wildly.

Stiles dug his fingers into Derek’s shoulders with his own grasp, and returned Derek’s passion with just as much as his own.

He moved a hand from the wolf’s square shoulders to his short, dark hair, and ran his fingers through it just as fluid as their kiss.

Derek’s lips traveled to Stiles’ chin. His jawline. His Adam’s apple. His pulse point. Derek stayed there, and Stiles never wanted him to leave. He tilted his head back a bit, allowing Derek more access as he licked, sucked, and bit at the thumping spot between his collarbone and his jaw.

“Derek…” Stiles moaned. “Derek. Take me upstairs.”

Derek immediately broke their kiss and sprung from the chair, leaving Stiles stunted on the forest green cushion.

Derek trembled. His head hung low and eyes closed, willing his wolf to heel.

Stiles could see it. He could see it on Derek’s face. All over Derek’s face. The guilt. The insecurity. The disappointment. And worst of all, the self-loathing. Stiles had enough.

“No. No, you don’t get to do this. Not this time. Not a third time, Derek. You take that werewolf Jesus routine and you fuck off with it, because no. Absolutely not.”

“Stiles, I’m—”

“Yet, you keep coming back, and I keep wanting you to, but not anymore. I’m done. I can’t anymore. I don’t want to keep doing this with you,” Stiles said, his voice breaking and shattering all over Derek like glass.

He doesn’t want to cry. Not in front of him. Not over this. And not again…but the tears burned at the back of this throat, and made it hard to swallow all of it. All the anguish and pain and exhaustion that came with wanting someone that kept pushing you away, but not really. Someone that thought a kept distance was helping you, when it really making it harder.

Stiles let the tears run down his face, because what else is he going to do? And because he wanted Derek to see him hurt. To see his martyrdom was the reason he hurt so much. Moreover, so he could add it to the long list of other things he felt guilty for and would never get over.

He wiped the tears away with his hand. He stood, his shoulders square, confident in the decision he made when he decided to keep the backdoor unlocked. “You can go now. I don’t want you here. At all. Ever.”

“Stiles—”

“Fuck you.”

“Stiles—”

“Fuck you.”

“St—”

“Fuck you. I hate you.” The tears are back, swimming to the surface and turning his eyes to pools of glass.

Derek reached for him, but Stiles backed away.

He reached for him again, and Stiles pushed him. “I hate you.” Derek kept pulling. “I hate you!” Derek won’t let go. “I fucking hate you!” Derek held him close, their foreheads touched, an arm wrapped around Stiles’ body. Derek’s thumb swept across Stiles’ cheek, wiping away the tear there. “…I love you,” Stiles whispered.

“I know… I love you, too.”

Stiles fisted Derek’s shirt and held him there like a tether. If he let go, Derek would fly. He’d float away and not look back. Stiles wished he had nails. Long, 10’’ nails that he’d hammer into the soles of Derek’s shoes, keeping him with him and always on the ground.

“Then be with me. Don’t do this to me again. I won’t recover this time, and I can’t let you come back again.”

“I want… I want to be different…for you.”

Stiles pulled back and looked at Derek, into jade-colored eyes that were bloodshot and dark; sick with need and desperate with want. “I’d make you different. I’d make you happy. You know that.”

“I wouldn’t make you happy. You’re not happy now.”

“Because you won’t give us what we need—each other. Stop. Please. Act like you love me, and that it’s not a lie.”

“It’s not,” Derek responded, sounding offended. “I love you. That’s not a lie.” Derek kissed him. Kissed him with all he had in him. It was voracious and devoted.

Stiles appreciated the tense grip Derek held in his hair, guiding his mouth where he wanted, slipping his tongue between Stiles’ lips and massaging it against his own. Stiles moaned into it with a lewd sound that made Derek tighten his hold on him.

Stiles tugged on Derek’s shirt, pulling him toward the sofa. Stiles laid back and Derek crawled atop of him, mouth still assaulting Stiles’ with complete greed.

Stiles’ hands found Derek’s hair again and carded through the midnight black strands with blunt nails against his scalp. Derek growled, and grinded his hardness against Stiles’ cock.

Stiles gasped cravenly at the feeling, suspending their kiss.

His heavy-lidded eyes opened at the man hovering above him. He stared at Stiles, unblinking, mouth parted in utter regard. He didn’t move; frozen in that look he bored into the boy beneath him…

“Derek…?” Stiles placed a gentle hand on Derek’s face. Derek closed his eyes and shuddered. “I’m here. I’m here,” Stiles said as he placed a tender kiss on the wolf’s lips. “Tell me,” he whispered against Derek’s mouth. “Tell me.”

Derek slowly opened his eyes. He peered into honey brown ones that shined like pennies. Tears fell down his face. He ducked his head low.

Stiles couldn’t hear it. Derek said it too quietly. So softly Stiles wasn’t sure if he had spoken, or simply sniffled. “What?”

Derek’s eyes met his again. Derek’s hand came up and he stroked his fingers softly down Stiles’ lips. “…Okay.”

“’Okay’?”

“Okay… Make me happy. And I’ll make you happy.”

He was at a loss. He was without words. He didn’t think there were any for what was just said. At least none that came to mind, and would encompass the crippling emotion that crashed over him like a hurricane.

Derek sat up and climbed off Stiles. Stiles nearly broke down, assuming his silence had answered for him with the brooding wolf and he was leaving.

Instead, Derek lifted Stiles off the sofa. Stiles hooked his legs around Derek’s hips.

He allowed a smile to bloom on his face when he noticed Derek walk them toward the stairs.

“Are you taking me to bed?”

“Yes.”

“Are you getting into bed with me?”

“Yes.”

“Naked with me?”

“Yes.”

“Will we be kissing and touching while we’re naked?”

“Yes.”

“Will you stay the night?”

“Until your father gets home, yes.”

“Will you be back later? And the next day? And the next day? And everyday after?”

Derek stopped just before Stiles’ bedroom door. He gave Stiles a dirty kiss, licking into his mouth and nipping his bottom lip. Then smiled, “Yes.”

“Good.”

Derek’s mouth latched onto Stiles’ neck as he pushed them inside and Stiles swung the door shut.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it :)


End file.
